To be short and to the point and offer a quickie summation: squirting is often associated with the G-Spot or the ‘G-Spot orgasm,’ and is apparently proportional to the amount of Skene’s glands and each women won’t have the same distribution of Skene’s glands. All over the web, there are blogs and various sexual advice sites that tend to feature squirters and some sites, like AskMen link squirting with orgasm or the intensity of orgasm with squirting which is fallacious, wrong…and…well…WRONG.

Women can orgasm and not ejaculate. There are many medical professionals who are still skeptical about female ejaculation and this is related to the lack of research. Blogs aren’t research. Personal accounts on blogs aren’t research and despite what is popular in porn, professional researchers (in the fields of urology or gynecology) aren’t easily persuaded. What does this mean? It means more research is required.

On the web, the subject of squirting vs non-squirting or the ‘freakish aspect of squirting’ has garnered some heated discussion. Personally, I can see the humor. Well from my end I can laugh with the column in Toy With Me because I’ve experienced quite tawdry and tedious attempts to squirt with partners to focus on my orgasm instead. Apparently it’s impolite to express an opinion that differs from the virtual norm. It would be interesting to conduct extensive research – no surveys (they tend to be biased) – to find out the proportion of squirters and non-squirters. Call my a tetchy little cynic, but I suspect that there are those who prefer to be squirters for the sake of belonging in a trendy group. What does that mean for the (seemingly) smaller proportion of non-squirters?

Are we abnormal?

Twenty years ago, it didn’t matter if we squirted or not, just as long as we enjoyed sex. But it seems that one needs to belong in one of two groups.

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According to the site bio:

So I printed out stickers in a bunch of different sizes, took them everywhere with me, and started taking photos. It quickly turned into an obsession, and I ended up with a book. So then I asked for audience participation, and we ended up with another book

Submissions are also welcomed by Fuck this Website.

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DSPF: What is it like to publish an erotic fiction ezine and what inspired you?

AM: There are days when I don’t consider myself as a publisher. Of course that is based on the image I have in my head of what a publisher should be, which I shake off each time. I’d say that it’s bittersweet; I feel terrible when I decline stories that writers have obviously poured themselves into, I feel ecstatic when I read other stories that adequately convey the writer’s voice. It’s a mixed bag. At the time I was working in a go-nowhere day job in a telco, replete with petty office politics and wanted to create an online presence that focused on publishing erotica.

DSPF: A quick web search confirms that you also write erotica. What is your most recent story?

AM: I do write the occasional erotic short story. I haven’t had much time this year. My most recent short story, Stripped, appears in Best Women’s Erotica 2010. For me, that’s enough for one year. I feel privileged to have had my story selected by Violet Blue and be within the company of BWE writers. It’s like achieving an ultimate goal. I can now sleep easy. Five years ago, I hoped for some of my stories to appear in print anthologies and be accessible on the other side of the world. Now it’s a reality, I’m content.

DSPF: What is it about?

AM: It’s about a young woman between sexual-cultural crossroads, whose life changes when she becomes the fourth room mate for three men. The change is, of course, sexual. It is erotica.

DSPF: I’ve read it. I expected the usual one-on-one sexual awakening of sorts, but you gave readers a group sex session.

AM: I did. One some levels I think that being with more than one man ranks equally as the traditional MFF threesome fantasy. I was going for a goddess worship type of scenario; the male room mates aren’t just fornicating, the sex isn’t transient. They’ll be cohabiting. So it’s more close to a polyandrous setup and why not? I come from a culture that focuses on men coming first (sometimes literally) or men dominating on some level.

DSPF: What is it like reading erotica submissions?

It varies. It also depends on the mood. I’ll just say that I don’t base my reading days on routine. I don’t wake up and think, “Right, it’s almost 9 AM.” I’m not a creature of routine that way as I feel that to approach erotica in a regimented manner will affect the novelty or sense of spontaneity. Routine tends to establish assocations and, over time, negative associations or those associated with drudgery.  I’ve never been fond of regimentation. It may work for others but it doesn’t work for me. Everyone needs to find what works for them.

AM: How long does it take for you to decide on a story?

AM: Sometimes it can take days. Other times, I can see the potential from the first sentence or paragraph. As a rule, though, if the first two to three paragraphs are tedious, have spelling errors or contain faulty clauses, an internal alarm bell rings.

DSPF: What is your ultimate aim within the arena of erotica?

AM: Lucrezia Magazine is like an erotic way station. There are no current plans to make it a print publication due to the complications that would arise. Where I live, the print process is expensive and complicated due to the adult classification. Most magazines with adult classifications or with explicit adult content -photographic or literary – have sealed sections. Ideally, I’d like to work toward editing a print anthology. I have a few thematic ideas that resonate with contemporary trends.

DSPF: Any you care to reveal?

AM: No, I’ll keep them under my hat for the time being. I have an idea for an erotic anthology that has the potential of being a significant visual as well as literary vehicle. I’ll leave it at that.

DSPF: Any tips for erotica writers?

AM: I think my tips are for writers in general, but for those planning to write erotica or entertain the idea: take erotica seriously. I’ve received stories from writers who assume erotica to be an easy genre. It’s not. Write, write and write. Develop a sense of perseverance. Don’t take rejections personally – unless you offend an editor and keep on ignoring editorial guidelines. It doesn’t always happen but it can happen. Most importantly, read your final draft aloud before submitting it to an editor or publisher. One of the most difficult thing is to re-read a story and confirm its status (finished vs. ongoing). My quick tip: If the themes come together and it reads smoothly, it’s there. If you need to backtrack to redefine a concept or the point of view changes halfway through, it needs more work. If it sounds iffy to you as you’re reading aloud, then it will sound iffy to an editor.

DSPF: Anastasia, thank you for your time.

AM: It‘s been a pleasure. Thank you for your questions and good luck with your blog.

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This year’s bad sex shortlist (The Guardian) features the usual literary suspects but Phillip Roth tops the list with a seduction scene that has slightly chauvinistic and, perhaps, personal fantasy undertones: the seduction of a lesbian by an older man featuring a green dildo. I’ve known some men who harbor the fantasy of converting lesbians. Is it about conversion or is it also about phallic (theirs) worship?

The Pulitzer prize-winning Roth makes the line-up for The Humbling, in which the ageing actor Simon converts Pegeen, a lesbian, to heterosexuality. The Literary Review singled out a scene in which Simon and Pegeen pick up a girl from a bar and convince her to take part in a threesome. Simon looks on as Pegeen uses her green dildo to great effect. “This was not soft porn. This was no longer two unclothed women caressing and kissing on a bed. There was something primitive about it now, this woman-on-woman violence, as though in the room filled with shadows, Pegeen were a magical composite of shaman, acrobat, and animal. It was as if she were wearing a mask on her genitals, a weird totem mask, that made her into what she was not and was not supposed to be,” writes Roth. “There was something dangerous about it. His heart thumped with excitement – the god Pan looking on from a distance with his spying, lascivious gaze.”

Either way, sex in literary fiction tends to be eye watering – for all the wrong reasons.

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One comment that drew my eye was a reference to the word ‘filth’ and the (commentator’s) overall disdain.

Pornography is common. It has been with society since ancient times and yes, it may as well be mainstream. It may not be approved web viewing during work hours, but for adults, it is common viewing.

Oprah’s webpage has a fantastic selection of articles for everyone interested in erotica. There is a beginner’s guide to erotica, an interview with now-retired adult film star Jenna Jameson and a whole lot more.

Sexuality shouldn’t be a shameful subject, something that is kept behind closed doors for to keep it hidden means to be less open and, ultimtely, counterproductive.

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The sought after identity of the Belle du Jour sex blog which inspired the TV series ‘Secret Diary of a Call Girl,’ has now been revealed. Belle du Jour is a British researcher named Brooke Magnanti and the reason behind the revelation is quite ordinary: she was afraid her ex-boyfriend would spill the beans. According to Associated Press:

Brooke Magnanti was quoted by the Sunday Times as saying she decided to reveal her secret because she was afraid an ex-boyfriend would expose her.

Magnanti, 34, is a child health researcher at the University of Bristol in western England. She told the newspaper she turned to the sex trade in 2003 while finishing her PhD and worked as an escort for more than a year.

She blogged about the experience in the guise of Belle de Jour, a legal secretary who moonlights as a sex worker.

The blog formed the basis of three books and the British TV series, Secret Diary of a Call Girl, shown on Showtime in the United States.

It raises the issue of how much to reveal to boyfriends. Boyfriends can become husbands…and relationships break up. It’s not necessarily about the erosion of trust but in a highly consumptive world where money replaces the most common aphrodisiacs, it is the biggest incentive for ex-partners to spill the beans.

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“four of us (Addiego, Belzer, Perry, and Whipple) were able to observe her response to digital massage of her Grafenberg spot, which led to expulsion of liquid, and reportedly and apparently to orgasm, on several occasions. On none of these occa- sions did stimulation of the clitoris, direct or otherwise, appear to occur.”

It should be noted that the research didn’t support an earlier hypothesis of female ejaculation being followed by a refractory period, as is found in the male sexual response but it indicated that the phenomenon of female ejaculation existed – without visible stimulation of the clitoris. But other researchers haven’t bought into the idea due to the lack of wider reportage; not all women ejaculate upon orgasm.
It’s not surprising to see further study. Research that offers new constructs tends to promote ongoing research, that may affirm or refute early research constructs. Take Sigmund Freud’s view of the two female orgasms. Most women may disagree with the idea of a vaginal orgasm if they have difficulty experiencing, what they perceive to be a vaginal orgasm and this perception is put forth by subjective viewers. Those who either have something to gain (financial) by maintaining the age old orgasmic dichotomy.
In 2005, extensive research on the structure and arrangement of the clitoris was presented in a paper titled, The Anatomy of the Clitoris (O’Connell, Sanjeevan and Hutson, 2005). The comprehensive presentation of the clitoris in this paper is unlike the socially approved and limited representations of the clitoris. Frankly, the usual representation of the clitoris, as a button-like feature still prevails in most literature. In their paper, O’Connell et al acknowledge the G-Spot and its sensitivity, as indicated by ultrasound studies. Further , they note that the G-Spot focus may be due to the “erectile tissue itself as it wraps around the distal urethra and vagina.” In their MRI scans, the researchers didn’t find additional structures that could be classified as a ‘G Spot,’ in terms of a space, not a structure.
In 2008 (Giovanni, Brandetti, Martini, Carosa, Di Stasi, Morano, Lenzi and Jannini, 2008), more research followed with Italian researchers proclaiming to have located the actual region of the G-Spot via ultrasonography. The researchers stop short of describing the orgasm a la Freud and opt for the term ‘vaginally activated orgasm.’ The research follows from O’Connell et al (2005), with the Italian researchers making their measurements in the area described by O’Connell et al (Figure 1). The researchers propose that womens’ orgasmic responses vary due to individual differences in anatomical arrangement with differences in orgasm being “partially attributed to differences in the extension and reciprocal relationship” of nerve endings, Skene’s glands and the corpora cavernosa of the bulb of the clitoris. Further into the article, the researchers opt to use the term vaginal orgasm, which is like a back-flip. They state that women experiencing ‘vaginal orgasms’ have a thicker urethrovaginal space but stop short of attributing any orgasmic mechanism in this area. What can be made of this?
Foldes and Buisson (2009) present more recent research via a sonographic study of the ‘clitoral complex’ to visualise movement of the ‘clitoral complex’ during a voluntary perinea contraction. They too find a link between the experience of G-Spot related pleasure and the internal root of the clitoris, confirming the anatomical relation to orgasm, but they too refrain from making any decisive conclusions.
Despite the recent research and improved imagining technologies, there is no general consensus and, unbelievably, the antiquated Freudian categories of vaginal vs. clitoral remain part of the sexual vocabulary.

~~

Addiego F; Belzer EG; Comolli, J; Moger, W; Perry, JD; Whipple, B. (1981). “Female ejaculation: a case study.” Journal of Sex Research 17 (1): 13-21

O’Connell, H; Sanjeevan K V; Hutson J M (2005). “Anatomy of the clitoris.” Journal of Urology 174: 1189-1195.

Giovanni GL; Brandetti F; Martini P; Carosa E; Di Stasi S; Morano S; Lenzi A; Jannini E A. (2008). “Measurement of the thickness of the urethrovaginal space in women with or without vaginal orgasm.” Journal of Sexual Medicine 5 (3) 610-618.

Foldes P and Buisson O. (2009). “The clitoral complex: A dynamic sonographic study.” Journal of Sexual Medicine 6: 1223-1231.

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